Ned's Special Introduction
Do you haaaave any wood? Hmmm? Do you haaave any wood? Hello, my name is Ned and I like Honey Nut Cheerios!
So, like, I wrote this story because I needed to tell someone it so now you can all read it. I'm a video maker, okay? Not an experienced author. So like forgive me for any bad writing I really no care. This is just for you to understand the events of Christmas 2011 better, ok? So yeah...like...I wrote this in third person because if it was in first person that would just be weird. I prefer third person overall because it tells the story bette- oh what am I saying? Just read the story. Enjoy.
Christmas, a time for celebration, happiness and sometimes vacation. A time of relaxation and relief, yes. But all for one boy who will save the country and its people – Ned Thunderzap. This story is about Ned and his adventures in the Christmas season of December 2011. Having spent only a year in the United States, Ned has finally settled down in his new home with his awesome and caring father.But just as he puts his head back and relaxes, the unexpected happens.
Ned Thunderzap woke up suddenly with a happy feeling inside of him – full of Christmas spirit. Today was December 23rd. Ned took out his camera that he got last year for Christmas in which his mother gave him. He set it up and started filming a video. “Do you haaaave any wood? Hmmm? Do you haaaave any wood? Hello, my name is Ned and I like Honey Nut Cheerios!” He said, which is his greeting to others since he is allergic to wood and needs to make sure the person he is greeting doesn’t have any wood, and it’s also his regular intro. “Well, today is a happy day because it’s the day before the day before Christmas! Yes! How awesome is that? I can’t really talk long because I want to like go have Honey Nut Cheerios and watch the morning news before I start celebrating, but I just wanted to say that Christmas here in America is awesome. Back in India, it was awesome; it was just that my mother and awful brother Mac didn’t care about it and thought it was like a chore to do it every year. But my father is almost as enthusiastic about it as I am which is cool. Anyways, I have to go. I’ll talk to you lat-“ Suddenly, there was a LOUD crash just outside his window. “What the heck?” Ned said out loud. He became concerned to what the noise was and stopped recording. He closed his camera and shut it off and put his shoes on so he could go outside. On his way to the door, after having put on his shoes, he grabbed a windbreaker coat from the coat rack and went to the side of his house. He was immediately greeted by the harsh cold and he closed 90% of his eyes in which he had to squint, just so the windy blow didn't dry his eyes out. As he made his way to the side of the house, he looked around. It was brightly overcast, but not as if it was before a thunder storm, instead, a snow storm. Ned had never been in snow before, so this winter might be his first time experiencing it. He made it to the side of the house and saw nothing. Ned was getting cold and held his arms close to his body, trying to keep himself warm. He thought that maybe it was nothing, so he turned around to go back inside when all of a sudden a voice came from behind him. “What the heck?!” The voice shouted. Ned jumped and looked behind himself to see Santa Claus sitting against the side of Ned’s house, with a Coca Cola glass in his hand. “Are…are you Santa Claus?!” Ned shouted in a whisper. “Some say I am, yet others say my name is Carly.” He began to laugh. “Trust me, you don’t want to know the story behind that one!” He said, taking a drink from the glass in his hand. Ned was confused. “So wait, are you really the real Santa Claus?” He said, going closer to him. “Well of course I am, boy!” He said in reply. “You don’t look that old and you don’t have a beard!” Ned pointed out. “Well excuse me if I try to change my image. Imagine being called fat and jolly for like 200+ years and when they do they just say it casually as if making fun of people like that is normal. I thought the world was messed up back then, you should see it now! Good Lord!" Ned remained quiet for a few seconds. “So how did you get here?” Ned asked him. “I’m not here. I’m a hologram.” Ned’s eyes widened. “A hologram? But how?” Ned said, putting his fingers on Santa, which went through him and revealed the hologram’s distortion. “Wow!” Ned said, pulling his arm back. “Don’t do that, alright? It tickles. Anyways, I have a friend who was with me on my slay when I was doing a test run a few hours ago. His name’s the Christmas Pig.” Ned recognized the name from last summer when he was in Virginia and discovered the Christmas Pig hiding with the former’s kidnapped Electronic Dog. “The Christmas Pig? What was he doing there with you?” Ned asked him. “He’s an employee, alright? That doesn’t matter. What matters is that he suggested you. We’re in a pickle here; we got shot down by that Doctor Zeckinberg. We were using a shortcut from Canada to the United States by flying over his base when we were doing a test run for the sleigh and they detected us and shot us down. Long story short, all my reindeers are injured and can barely walk let alone fly, and they have me locked up in this room. I don’t know where they have the Christmas Pig, but the Christmas Pig gave me this hologram device before they split us up and told me to contact the person named Ned on the contact list. He said that you could help someway like with the President? I don’t know what he was talking about. All I know is that we’re somewhere between the United States and Canadian border, a few miles out into the ocean on an iceberg or island or something. It’s freezing here, as you can see I don’t have my coat, only my undershirt on. Now I’m sort of regretting shaving off my beard because it helped me stay warm in these type of situations, not that I have ever been in these type of situations. Anyways, you know where we are. Please help us. You’re our last chance of getting out of here alive. I don’t know what they’ll do to us in here, but you better make it quick. Please, Ned.” Santa said, before the hologram cut off. As the hologram cut off, a small metal circle appeared where Santa Claus was sitting. Ned picked it up and looked at it. It was completely metal and it was heavy. Ned started touching it all over and it opened up suddenly, scaring Ned, and he dropped it. As it fell, it didn’t get damaged, it just started playing Santa Claus’ encounter with Ned over again. The hologram that Ned was talking to was a live feed with Santa Claus and it was being recorded over for future use. Ned closed the hologram projector and put it in his pocket. As he did that, his father started coming around the side of the house. “Ned?” He asked his son. “Yeah?” Ned replied, turning around. “What was that loud bang? Did you do that?” Ned shook his head. “No, I don’t know what it was. I was just looking around out here and didn’t find anything. Let’s go back inside.” He said, walking past him.
Once Ned got inside, he went into his room, closed the door and called the President. The President finally picked up and greeted Ned with his usual welcome, but Ned talked over him, in a distress state. “Whoa, whoa, Ned! Calm down. I can’t understand you. What’s wrong?” The President said. “Santa Claus appeared out of nowhere at the side of my house in this holographic state and asked for my help!” He said to him. “Oh, Ned! You are too funny!” He said, laughing. “No, it’s not a joke! He’s been kidnapped along with the Christmas Pig by a guy named Doctor Zechinberg! They got shot down when they were testing out the sleigh and now they’re trapped there! The Christmas Pig says I can help with the help of you.” The President was thinking of an answer, still confused but he knew that this was now a serious problem. “Alright, I’m going to send an agent over in a helicopter to bring you back to the White House in a few hours and we’ll discuss further matters there.”
About 20 minutes later, Ned laying in his bed and was looking at small metal device. “Hmmm.” Ned said. He heard his father’s footsteps outside his door, and Ned put the hologram projector underneath his pillow. Ned’s father knocked on the door and opened it up. “Are you okay, Ned? I’m making breakfast.” He told him. “Great!” Ned said, momentarily forgetting about what just happened.
Ned and his father ate breakfast while watching the news in their kitchen.
A few minutes after eating, Ned heard a helicopter in the distance. “Father! The President has…given me a mission to go on. I’ll talk to you later.” Ned said, abruptly and left his house. The helicopter landed in Ned’s backyard. The helicopter’s blades and engine were extremely powerful so Ned had to walk with force in order to not be pushed back by the current of air that was slamming into him. “Ned Thunderzap?!” A man in a suit shouted, getting out of the helicopter. “Yes, I am him!” Ned replied. Ned was barely able to hear himself due to the loud noise of the helicopter. “Okay, good! Uh…the President requested you back at the White House, are you all ready?” Ned nodded. “Alright, good! Let’s go!” He started speed walking back into the helicopter. Ned joined him and looked back at his house. He saw his father in the back kitchen mirror, waving him goodbye. Ned waved back and put on a headphone set so they can talk somewhat quieter and understand each other better.
It took them about a half an hour to get to Washington D.C.
When they got there, they landed on the front lawn of the White House and walked into the President’s home. The President greeted Ned at the front door. “Nice to see you, Ned!” He said, putting his arm across Ned’s shoulder. “Same!” Ned said in reply. The two walked into the Oval Office and the President put his finger on a metal device and it scanned his fingerprint. Suddenly, a secret door was revealed and the President, Ned and two other agents that guarded the President went into a secret elevator. As they were going beneath the White House, Ned broke the silence in the elevator. “So…what’s happening?” “We’ll discuss further matters in a few minutes.” The President said. The way the President said that kind of made Ned nervous. Where was Ned going? The President had never been this serious around Ned before.
When the secret room was reached, the elevator doors opened up and revealed a giant headquarters beneath the White House. “Woah!” Ned exclaimed as he set eyes on several giant computer monitors and high tech equipment. “This way” The President said, directing Ned. They made their way into a small room that looked like an office. Ned took a seat and so did the President. “The reason I’ve been…a little more serious in the past few minutes,” The President started “is because this is a serious matter. This is a hostage situation. If we aren’t careful, Zechinberg could become a terrorist threat.” There was that name again... “Zechinberg”. “Who is Zechinberg?” Ned asked him. “He’s a maniac. He worked for the CIA back in the 80’s and 90’s. We found out he had a mental problem that he kept hidden from us and when we tried to help him, he went berserk and took out a gun. Unfortunately, he killed two agents. He took a ton of our equipment and tons of secret documents and loaded it onto this truck of his. He took that truck and crossed the border into Canada with it. He then went to the east coast of Canada and shipped the material he stole out onto a secret US military island we used back in World War II that was abandoned at the time. He cleaned it up and now uses it as his secret base. Since he is a serious threat, we could just use an airstrike and take him out, but he knows we wouldn’t because he has unique equipment and those secret documents I mentioned earlier. If we lose them, decades of hard work and money would just be wasted.” “So I’m going to be going up against this guy?” Ned asked him. “Yes. Santa Claus asked you and only you to do this mission so you’re needed. Unfortunately, all our agents are busy. Is there anyone you can trust who is smart and strong?” The President asked Ned. “Hmm.” Ned said, putting his finger on his chin.
“So can you help me out?” Ned asked his cousin, Den. “I don’t know, man. I mean, this is some serious stuff though.” “I know that! I just need somebody to go with me.” Den thought it through for a moment. “Alright, fine! I’ll do it.” “Great!” Ned said, excited.
A few days later, Ned and Den were in the secret headquarters of the White House. “Alright, me-…uh…boys…here’s what you need to do: You’re going to parachute out of a helicopter, into the Border Forest. The Border Forest is an extremely large forest that sits in between the border of the US and Canada. The Forest is guarded by a corrupt cop that goes by the name Philip. He guards the Forest all hours of the day and let’s dogs guard the perimeter at night when he’s sleeping. So look out for him. You’ll then also need to travel across five miles of ocean water that’s infested by sharks. Here’s everything you need.” The man said, giving them backpacks full of food and clean water. “The backpacks also have a How To Survive In The Wild guide book in case if you run out of food and water and need to make a fire or something. Everything settled?” He asked the two boys. “Uh…I think so.” Ned said, thinking about all that he just said, even though he forgot most of it by now since he was nervous and thinking so hard that he was forgetting stuff. “Good. Now let’s go!”
The three then went into a helicopter and flew across four states so they could get up north. As they approached their destination, Ned peeked out the window of the helicopter and saw the Forest. The Forest was so huge and so populated with trees, it was impossible to see the ground due to the thickness of the tree branches. “Landing down there is going to be really hard!” The agent said, putting the helicopter on autopilot and getting out of his seat. He went over the advanced instructions and stages of parachuting for the two to do when the time comes. “What if we hit a tree branch? Will we get caught and be stuck there forever? Or will it detach our chute and we’ll fall to our deaths?” Den asked the agent. “Good question. Either one of those scenarios can happen. So you’re going to, and this may sound risky for beginners, but you’re going to have to detach your parachute so you land on the top branch of any tree you land on. It’s impossible to land by deflecting the branches and landing perfectly on the ground.” Ned and Den stared at him with a “are you crazy?!” face. “Trust me, it’s really easy.” He said. “Alright, I guess we’ll have to do it anyways. Thanks for the tip!” Ned said, getting ready to jump. “Now before you jump, just remember you’re not going to have any form of connection with us until you get to that island since you don’t have phones and even if you did, the thickness of the branches would block out the signal. So be extremely careful!” He said, warning them. “Got it!” Den said. “Good luck, boys!” He said, getting back into his seat. Ned and Den took their headphones off together. “Ready, Den?!” Ned shouted. “Heck yeah I am!” He shouted back. Ned smiled and got ready to jump and so did Den. “3…2…1!” Ned shouted, jumping out of the helicopter. “HOLY CRAAAAAP!” Ned shouted. He was twirling in the air for several seconds. He steadied himself as he was hurtling towards the ground. He looked all around for Den in the air, but didn’t see him. He didn’t have much longer to think, the tree tops were approaching. Ned pulled the string to his parachute and his chute opened up, slowing him down a small amount. He steered himself down further and further. Seconds later, he hit the tree top roughly, and the top of it stabbed him in the ribs. “Ahhh!” Ned shouted in pain. Luckily, it only bruised it, but it felt like the branch penetrated through his skin and bone, that’s how painful it was. Ned looked around for Den. It seemed like he didn’t jump yet. “Den!” Ned shouted. “Where is h….” Ned was saying as he saw Den jump out of the helicopter and flail his arms everywhere in the process. “Oh, there he is.” Ned said to himself. “HELP MEEEEE!” Den shouted. “Pull your chute, Den!” Ned shouted to him, although Den couldn’t hear him. Den realized that the tree top was right in front of him and pulled his chute at the last minute. Luckily, he saved himself from death, but his chute turned to the right a little bit and got stuck in a branch instead of on the top of the tree. “Ned! Ned! Where are you?!” He shouted. “Hold on!” Ned shouted from a few steps away. Den landed in a different tree than him which was a few 10-20 steps away. Ned had to walk CAREFULLY on the unsteady thin branches. “Hold on, cousin!” Ned said, letting his cousin know he was still there. “Hurry! I feel…I feel like I’m slipping!” Den was nervous. A second later, Den’s parachute got untangled and he started to fall to his death. Ned dived into the sea of branches and grabbed Den by his long, curly hair. “AAAHHHH!” Den screamed in agony. Ned had a firm grasp on a branch above him. “Detach your parachute and grab onto one of these branches, Den! My arm hurts!” Den hurried and did what he said. “Okay, okay! I’m safe!” Den gave Ned the OK to let him go.
Ned and Den were now standing next to each other on a giant tree. Ned looked down and immediately got frightened. His eyes widened and he took a step back. “What’s wrong, Ned?” Den asked him. “Don’t. Look. Down.” Ned said in reply to his cousin. Of course, Den did so and he too got frightened. “Holy crap!” He took a step back also. “We have to get down there. We have to save the day!” Ned said, facing fear as he started climbing down the branches. “But couldn’t we just like camp up here for the night or something?” Den asked him, not wanting to go down. “We’re standing on branches. How are we going to sleep up here?” Den didn’t say anything to reply, feeling like an idiot, he just followed Ned. It took them about an hour to climb down the tree. There were plenty of moments where Ned and Den almost slipped and killed themselves, but they made it.
They hopped down off the final branch of the tree together and landed in a fluffy pile of leaves that fell last autumn. “Alright, well, when I was falling, I could see the end of the forest which I THINK was that way…” Ned said, pointing north. “Well then, let’s go!” Den started to jog in that direction. A sudden realization struck Ned. “Wait, Den! You remember what that agent told us? That police officer always patrols this area throughout the day! We need to be quiet and not go out into the open.” Ned re-warned him. “Right, I forgot. Sorry.” He apologized. “It’s fine, just keep an eye out for him.”
Several hours passed and they traveled up north…or what they thought was north. It was dusk and it was getting dark. To make things worse, the ground was no longer smooth full of fluffy leaves, it was now curved and steep every other step with a super sharp twig sticking out here and there. “Aargh! I can’t see in this stupid forest!” Ned said, agitated. “Wait, ssh! You hear that, cuz?” Den said, shushing Ned. The two were completely quiet. At first, Ned only heard himself breathing, but a few seconds later, he heard dogs barking in the distance. Ned looked in the direction in which he thought it was coming from, and squinted to see in the dark better. He made out the shape of the dog and how far away it was in seconds, but by then it was too late. “Watch out!” Ned said, as he saw the dog diving towards him and his cousin. Den dived, and so did Ned, but Ned got tackled by the bulldog. “Get off me, puppy!” Ned shouted, as he was face to face with the dog’s giant mouth. Sharp teeth stuck out like razors and saliva from the dog’s mouth leaked out and fell on Ned’s winter coat. “Get off of him you goddamn idiot!” Den shouted as he grabbed a giant branch and smacked it against the dog’s body, which sent the bulldog flying, about twenty feet away. “Wow! Lucky hit!” Ned said, impressed. “We have to keep moving! I heard two barks earlier, so there is more than one.” Ned and Den crouched and speed walked over to a tree, to use it as cover. “Okay, if I remember correctly, we have to go in this direction.” Ned said, taking out a map and looking at it. The moon lit the paper dimly, but they could see it. Ned’s heart pounded and Den was grinding his teeth, in nervousness. But they both stopped immediately when they heard something behind them. The two turned around and saw a fully black German Shepard with a giant mouth that could tear their arm off whole. He revealed his teeth at them which were razor thin and sharp. He was literally no more than three feet behind them. Ned and Den got up slowly and backed away from it. “Down, boy!” A strange voice rang out in the forest. The dog sheathed its teeth and sat down. Ned looked around for the person who spoke but couldn’t find anybody. Seconds later, a figured emerged from the shadows. He had a police outfit on. “You!” Den said, surprised. “Yeah, it’s me! What the hell are y’all doin’ in my forest?!” The Police Officer said, sounding angry. “W-We…were using this as a shortcut to get to a secre-“ Den was saying, about to give away their secret mission. “We…got lost!” Ned lied, saving themselves. “Well get lost somewhere else!” “Can you show us the way back to the road?” Den asked him. “Sure, just come back to my house. I have the map there.” Immediately after the officer said this, Ned and Den ran. “Run, cuz! Run!” Den shouted as he ran through the forest. Ned’s heart pounded and his body felt numb as he ran through the crowded forest. There was always a tree in his way. Was the Police Officer chasing them? He couldn’t tell. He didn’t want to know. He just kept running forward. As Ned ran deeper into the forest, he couldn’t see anything. “Den? Are you here?!” He shouted out. “I’m here, cuz! It’s just…lots of cobwebs!” Little did they know…they just walked into a cave. A cave of spiders. “Hey, where did all the trees go?” Ned asked out loud. It was so dark, Den had to use his arms for assistance. “I’m trying to find a light switch!” Den was blinded by the darkness. “There’s no light switch, you idiot! We’re outside!” Moments later, Den spoke again because he found something. “I have something! It’s warm…and it feels…hairy. Wait…wait what is dis?!” The moonlight shined inside the cave and revealed a huge tarantula that began wrapping its hairy legs around Den’s sweatshirt sleeve. “Holy crap, cousin! Run! Run! Run like the wind!” The two could now see that they weren’t in the forest and realized they were in a cave, so they ran out of the cave and back into the forest. As the two ran into the forest, they heard something to their left, and saw it was the Police Officer and his dog. “This way!” Ned said, guiding Den. They ran to their right. Meanwhile, Den still had the tarantula on his sleeve. As they were running, Den picked up a stick and started smacking the spider as he was running. “Get off me!” Den shouted. Den had it. He wasn’t continuing until he got this thing off of him. “Hold on, cousin!” Den told Ned. “Den, what are you doing?! He’s going to catch up any moment!” Ned said, nervous. Den began hitting his arm against a large tree and started hurting the spider. Moments later, a gunshot rang out which made the two jump. It was the Police Officer. He shot Den’s arm and unintentionally killed the spider. “He’s got a gun! Run!” Ned shouted. The dead spider’s corpse let go of Den and fell to the ground. Den ran after Ned. Ned and Den then dropped their backpacks, full of food and water, to run and escape faster and easier.
The two ran for about another twenty minutes. They kept running in a straight line. As they ran, the ground kept getting steeper until they unexpectedly reached the edge of the forest, which was the edge of a cliff. “Woah! Watch out!” Ned said, pulling Den back before he could fall off. “Woah!” Den said, looking over the edge. Below the cliff, was the ocean and tons of dangerous, sharp rocks that could kill them instantly. While Den was looking over the cliff, Ned looked out into the ocean. “There!” He said to himself. Miles out into the ocean, he could see the island the base was on. “That’s it! Now we just need to get some sort of boat and swim over there!” Ned continued. “Good luck with that, cuz. This ocean is furious! Look at it!” He said. Ned then saw what Den was talking about. The ocean was acting violent and out of control. It was almost like a mini-tsunami. “Well we have a mission to do! We can’t let water stop us!” “Where in the world are we going to get a boat?” Den asked Ned. “I don’t know. Let’s continue across this cliff and see where it takes us.” Ned suggested.
They did exactly that. Several hours later, the sky lit up a little and was now a greyish color. It was overcast and rainy. The leaves from the trees that fell in the previous season squished together on Ned’s shoe. Everything was wet from the rain and Ned and Den were exhausted. Ned fought to keep his eyes open every second. A few minutes later, Ned spoke. “Man, I can’t even keep my eyes open!” Ned waited for Den to reply, but when he didn’t, Ned turned around and was alarmed. “Oh no!” Ned said out loud. He wasn’t tired anymore. “What happened to him?!”
Meanwhile, Den spied on the Police Officer and his dogs. Den was inside a bush and listened in on the Police Officer. “Nah man, I’m just saying though. There were two kids around here that matched your description. I think it could be Ned.” He stopped talking, letting the person on the other line talk. “Sure. Alright. Alright. Okay thanks, Big M. Bye.” And then the Police Officer hung up. Den repositioned himself to the crouching more comfortable, but in doing so, stepped on a twig and made it snap. “Hey, what was that?” The Police Officer said. “Oh crap…” Den said in a low voice. “Hey, is someone in that bush?” The Police Officer asked, approaching it. Den burst himself out of the bush and ran in the opposite direction. “Get him, boy!” The Police Officer told his dog, which began sprinting after him. The dog caught up with Den and tackled him. “Get off me, stupid thing!” He wrestled with the dog, but the Police Officer broke up the fight. “I know who you are, Den.” The Officer said. “You do?! How?” Den asked. Instead of saying anything, the Police Officer just laughed and took out his gun. “Now, now, good sir! We could easily come to an agreement instead of resulting to violence, no?” Den tried to reason. But the Police Officer shot Den.
Ned heard the shot, but couldn’t figure out where it was. Ned went to Den’s location and saw Den dead. “Oh no!” Ned said. “I need to document this!” Ned took out his camera and began filming. “Okay…I think he died…of something.” Ned began examining his body and circled it, while keeping the camera pointed at the body. “But…it’s like…I think he touched some sort of wood out here. He is allergic to wood, like I am. But I think that only a rare kind affects him. It runs in the family line.” Ned then tried to get a shot of Den’s dead face, but then something weird happened. Den rose from the dead and put back on his glasses, which had previously fallen off from the shooting. “AAAHHH!!” Ned screamed loudly. “Who the heck are you?! That’s not my cousin!” Ned said, looking at him. “I’m Den’s Soul!” The body replied. “’Den’s Soul?’ Is this…Star Wars…or something?” Ned asked him. “No, this is just Den’s Soul. Sorry.” Den’s Soul got up and brushed the dirt off himself. “Well, did you die of wood?!” Ned asked him. “What de hell are you talking about?” Den’s Soul said casually. “Well how did you die? You died of something!” Ned explained. “Hmm…I’m not sure. I forgot the last minutes of my life.” Den said. “Hmm…well, at least you’re still alive…sort of.” Ned said. “Let’s continue, cousin!” Den said, running out of the forest. Ned gasped. “Woah! This is the end of the forest! How could I be so blind?” Ned said to himself. As the two got out of the forest, they reached a house. “Hey, maybe a person in this house can help us!” Ned suggested. “Hold on, dude. I’m going to go over there, okay? I’m going to go see if there is any news or anything, okay?” Den said, going up to the house. Ned stayed around the outside of the house and looked around. He was looking at a swing that was in the yard of the house, when something caught him off guard. “Hey!” A familiar voice rang out. “What the…” Ned began to say, totally stunned. It was the Police Officer. He was behind his fence, looking out at Ned. “Oh, not you again.” Ned said, tired of him. “Yeah, this is my house. What are you doing here, fool? You know, I’d knock you up again if I had to!” The Police Officer said, putting his hands up. Ned laughed. “You’re so funny! But seriously, I’d –“ But before Ned could finish his sentence, the Police Officer started other plans. “No, I’m coming out there!” He told him. As the Police Officer came outside, Ned punched him. This infuriated the Police Officer. So much, in fact, that he jumped over the fence into the yard. “Oh, you’re going to get it!” Ned said, picking him up and throwing him underneath the swing set.
Prior to these events, after Den left Ned, Den went to knock at the front door only to find that it was half open. “Hello?” Den asked, going inside. No one was home. When Den went inside, he noticed that he had two staircases in front of him. He could either go upstairs or downstairs. He decided to go downstairs. When he went downstairs, there was a giant table with paperwork on it. On some of the paperwork, Dr. Zechinberg’s name was written in the signature box. “Hmm…” Den said looking at it. “As he was looking at it, something shiny caught his eye. It was a golden plaque on the wall. “Police Officer – Five Excellent Years In The Force” Den read the plaque out loud. “The Police Officer’s a Jedi?!” Den said in confusion. Den then heard screaming outside. He opened the back door and ran outside. “Dude, you’ll never believe this! Guess whose house this is?” Den said, running to Ned, who had the Police Officer in his hands. “Guess whose house this is? Cuz, guess whose house this is – oh! You found him!” He said, grabbing the Police Officer. “Yeah – it’s his house.” Den said. “IT’S HIS HOUSE?!!!” Ned shouted. “You’ll never take me alive!” The Police Officer said. Since the Police Officer being held by Den, the former bit the latter’s thumb. “Ah! Frickin’ bit my thumb! Let’s go! Let’s go!” They walked away from the Officer’s house. “Hey cousin, this idiot is working with Zechinberg! He’s not just a police officer, he’s a police officer working with the fool!”
Minutes later, after being beaten severely by Den’s enraged soul, it was time for the Police Officer to answer questions. “Where’s the fat man at?!” Den shouted, slamming him against a cold, metal fence. “I don’t know! I don’t know!” Ned and Den didn’t buy it. “You know, I could take your dogs with me, label them as strays and put them in a shelter.” Ned threatened. “Oh God! Please don’t! I love those dogs! O-Okay! I’ll answer!” He said, nervous. Den’s grip on the Officer’s shirt tightened. “The fat man is on an island off-shore. You probably saw it when you were running away from me last night. He’s there with some of his elves and some sort of animal that helps him.” He explained. “Now what about Zechinberg? What was that paperwork in the lower floor of your house?!” Den asked. “I work for him! He told me to guard the forest so that the Americans can’t get to him. I can be here legally because the authorities believed the story I told them – that I’m protecting the forest from intruders and claimed it to be my property. So I can kill anybody who comes in here legally because it’s my property.” The Officer further explained. “Canada must be a messed up place for them to allow you to do that.” Ned said, confused. “Canadian and American border.” The Police Officer corrected Ned. “There’s a boat in my backyard. That’s what I use to go to the base and get back. But be careful. Because if Zechinberg or one of his elves sees you, he’s going to hide from you. He’s going to go to another town. What you have to do is…is…” The Police Officer lost his breath and died. “NOOOOOO!!!” Ned shouted. “What did he mean by ‘elves’, cousin? Does Zechinberg have his own army of evil elves?” Den asked. “I don’t know.” Ned replied, in thought. “Well let’s go get that boat he talked about.” Ned said.
After burying the Police Officer, the two took a large sheet that covered the boat off. “It’s kind of small.” Den said. “That’s good,” Ned explained. “Because if it was a giant boat they’d see us easier – this will keep us hidden.” The two took the boat and carried it into the forest. They found a lake in the forest that connected to the ocean and sat the boat down in it. “Let’s go!” Ned said, hopping into it. Since the boat was so light and small, it felt unsteady, but Ned caught his footing and he was fine. It was like a mini-speedboat. Den hopped on and the two drove it towards the island. The drizzling weather shortly turned into a thunderstorm. The waves became violent again and the sky was so dark it was almost black. “This isn’t good!” Ned shouted to Den. “What?!” Den asked him. “I cannot hear you!” Seconds later, a loud thunderclap occurred and made the two jump. “Oh cra-“ Den blurted out, before falling into the icy ocean. Due to the jump, Ned held onto the boat and only got his coat wet. “Oh no! Cousin?! Cousin?!” Ned shouted at the ocean, not being able to find Den. He couldn’t see Den at all. The ocean was like the sky – black. The ocean was moving so quick and violently, he couldn’t stay still. “DEN!” Ned shouted loudly, which echoed throughout the forest. The echo startled a few birds that were in the trees, and they flew out to the ocean. A second later, a large inhale happened behind Ned, which scared the latter. “What the –“ Ned said, turning around. “Den!” He said, helping him out of the water. Den’s hair was all wet and he had seaweed all over him. Den got back into the boat, with the help of Ned, and shivered. “It w-w-was cold in t-there!” He said, shivering even more. Ned felt bad because he didn’t have an extra coat to put over him. “Here, have my coat.” Ned offered. Den accepted and put it over his cold body. The waves were still ferocious and the two had to hurry. “We gotta move!” Ned said, putting the boat’s engine on the fastest speed possible.
About an hour and a half later, the two arrived at a rocky cliff on the edge of the island. Due to the violent waves, the boat was washed up on the rocks and broke down due to the violent collision. Ned helped Den out of the now-crashed boat. They walked into the forest that was in front of them. Rain poured down onto their heads and they slipped and tripped several times on the wet leaves beneath their feet. “I’m sick of this weather, cuz!” Den shouted. “Quiet!” Ned whispered. The reason Ned said this, was because they were approaching a gate with guards guarding the outside. “Look, Den! Look on the hill!” Ned pointed out. The gates they had to get across contained a small village, and in the middle of that village sat a hill. On the top of the hill, lay a concrete base. With a tower-extension. “We need to distract them, eh?” Den suggested. “You distract them, I’ll jump the fence and hide into one of the houses until the heat dies down.” Ned told him. “Got it!” Den crouched and ran towards the guard in stealth-mode.
“HEY!!! HEY!!!” Den shouted. “YOU KNOW WHAT REALLY SUCKS ABOUT THIS ISLAND? IS THAT THERE’S SO MUCH WILDERNESS AND SO LITTLE CIVILIZATION. THIS WILDERNESS, MAN. IT’S TOO MUCH!”
Den got the guards attention and they ran up to him, ordering him to stop. It was at this time that Ned ran up to the fence and jumped over it. He was afraid that someone would notice him, so he broke into the first house he saw, which was close to the gate, and hid in it.
The interior of the house was shaped oddly. It looked like it was grown, not built. The floor felt weird as well. Ned started jumping on the floor and tried to get a better feel of it. “What are you doing?” A small voice came from his left. Ned looked to where the voice came from and saw a small child around the age of 7. “I’m…feeling your floor with my feet.” Ned replied. “Why?” The child asked. “Because it feels weird! It doesn’t feel like this back at my house.” Ned jumped a few more times. “Where are your parents?” Ned asked him. “Mom and dad are at the market.” Ned was shocked by this. “And they left you all alone?!” Ned went over to the window and noticed that the guards had a knocked-out Den in their hands and were approaching the gates. “Oh crap! Do you have any idea how I can get up to that base thing on the hill?” Ned asked the child, pointing to the hill. “Of course! Go in the…uhh…” Ned was eager to hear the child’s response. “Uhh…” “Spit it out, child!” Ned shouted quietly. “The front door.” The child said. “Well then…that’s very useful.”
Meanwhile, Den awoke in a strange place. “Who are you and what are you doing here?!” An angry voice shouted to him. Den rubbed his eyes and saw a man in a lab coat. “Are you…” His voice trailed off. “Doctor Zechinberg? Ah, so you were looking for me, hmmm?” The doctor said, rubbing his chin. “Yes, we were. You’re an evil man and you must be stopped!” Doctor Zechinberg’s eyebrow rose. “’We’?” Den closed his eyes tightly and regretted saying “we”. “Guards, be on lookout. There may be another one of them on the island.” Zechinberg warned his guards. “Place him in a cell! Now!” Zechinberg demanded.
Den was placed in a cold and wet cell. Across his cell, was another cell that had something in it. It was moving and making strange noises. Den wasn’t sure if he should be curious or afraid or both. “Hello? Who…who’s there?!” Den shouted out, afraid. “Is that you, Ned?” A mysterious voice rang out. “No, it’s his cousin Den.” “Den?” “Who are you, mysterious voice?” “I am Santa Claus!” Santa Claus then appeared out of the shadows of the cell with the Christmas Pig in his arm. “Good Lord! You do exist!” “Of course I do! Now where is Ned?” “I…I don’t know. He’s in the town somewhere.”
Meanwhile, Ned was still in the house with the kid.
“Oh, before I go, is there any food I can borrow?” Ned asked the child, because he hadn’t eaten in two days. The child went over to the table and picked up an apple. “Here, my mother picked these this morning.”
“Thanks! So tell me a bit about your family. What are your mother and father like?” Ned bit into the apple. “My father works for the King and my mother sells fruits and stuff.” Ned froze. “The king? What’s the king’s name?” The child put his hand on his chin, thinking. “Erm…Zechinberg? I think.” “And he’s in that hill base thing? How did he become king? What does he do?” Ned pointed. “Well he found this land about forty years ago. He had more power than our race, the elves, so he conquered it. As King, he just experiments on us and orders us around or something like that. I don’t pay much attention to it in school. Why do you ask so many questions?” “I must leave immediately!” Ned shouted. Ned went out the front door, but was stopped by the child. “You’re going to the top of the hill, right? Well, you can use our secret passage!” The child said, grabbing Ned and taking him into a closet, where a tunnel was located in the ground. “Where does this lead to into the base?” Ned asked him. “I think…the basement. Look, if you want to speak to the King, you should do it right away! I think he’s leaving in a few hours.” Without being told twice, Ned jumped down into the tunnel and ran quietly inside it. He then heard a voice back where the child was. “Robin? What are you doing?!” An angry voice called. “Nothing, father! I was just showing someone this secret passage!” Ned’s eyes widened and his heart started beating faster. “What did I tell you? Don’t come into this room! You might slip and fall into the hole! Now what did this person look like?” But their voices became quieter and quieter because Ned was going deeper into the tunnel. The tunnel was almost like a sewer, except without the sewage. It was dark, wet and Ned could have sworn he saw a giant rat once or twice.
“Well, Doctor Zechinberg is leaving the island soon! I don’t know when though. We need Ned here and now!” Santa stressed. “Okay, okay! I’m sure he’ll be here any momen-“ Den’s sentence cut off as he saw Ned coming out of a manhole in between the cells. Den then heard a guard coming into the room. “Ned, Ned!” Den pointed to the door at the end of the hall. Ned nodded at Den and closed the manhole quietly, going back inside the tunnel. Ned then heard someone walking over the manhole. “What are you looking at?” He heard the guard ask Den. “Not you, because you’re so ugly.” Den replied quickly. “Oh yeah?!” The guard took his feet off the manhole and walked towards Den’s cell. At this point, Ned opened the manhole quietly and stepped foot in the room. Ned took the solid metal 50 pound manhole cover and hit the guard in the head with it. Ned heard a crack. “Oh no!” Did Ned kill him? Ned threw the cover on the ground and examined the guard. His head was cracked and blood was leaking out. “Get this God blessed gate open and I’ll help you!” Santa shouted. Ned found a pair of keys in the guard’s pocket and used it to open up Santa and Den’s cell. “But what about the dead guy?” Ned said, upset. “Here, watch this.” Santa said, going over to the guard. “He’s not dead yet, so I can help him.” Santa placed his hands on the guard’s head and shut his eyes tightly. A white glow appeared around Santa and the guard. “My Christmas gift to this man – a second chance.” Santa said, in a calm voice. Ned then heard sniffing behind him. Ned looked behind himself and saw Den crying. “Dude, are you crying?” Ned said, curious. Den nodded his head, not able to say anything. “It’s…just really nice of him! The Christmas spirit!” Den cried out of happiness. Ned wasn’t sure if he should be emotional too or ask Santa questions. The guard opened his eyes and inhaled deeply. The crack in his skull was healed and he stopped bleeding. “Now listen, boy. Do something good with your life. Don’t be a guard to some evil mad scientist doctor guy.” Santa said, giving him advice. The guard was in shock so all he could do was nod. “Good. Now, you’re the legendary Ned Thunderzap, yes?” Santa said, standing up and turning over to Ned. “Well, I wouldn’t say legendary but yes, I am Ned Thunderzap.” Ned replied. “Doctor Zechinberg is at the top floor. I recommend we stay together or else we die.” Santa told them. “My magic is no good here. That was only a basic healing spell I used on that guard. If we get to the top of the tower, I think I could use my magic there. I’m not sure though.”
Ned, Den, Santa Claus and the Christmas Pig escaped the prison quietly and undetected. The inside of Zechinberg’s base was huge. There was a huge dining room, and many balconies leading out to the open. “Cuz, there’s no way we can get past those guards!” Den said, pointing to six guards that were patrolling an elevator that went to the top floor. “We need to split up and take them off by ourselves.” Santa thought out loud. “But how? They have guns! We could get sho-“ Ned was saying, but Santa lifted his finger. “You see those swords over there, Den?” Santa asked him. Santa was referring to a collection of old antiques that were in a room across from them. In the room were old knight armor and shields and swords. “Yes I see it, but why would Zechinberg have all that?” Den asked, scratching his head. “Do not question good opportunities, my boy.” Santa said, patting him on the back. “Go get one of those long swords and hit the guards in the back of the head with the bottom of it. If you hit them too hard and they die, I’ll heal them.” Den nodded, crouched, and ran silently towards the room. He got two swords for Ned and himself. “Here!” Den said, handing Ned one. “Thanks!”
Ned and Den did what Santa said. Ned and Den circled the dining room table and took the guard’s out by hitting them on the back of the head with the 50 pound handle of the sword. They held the blade in a way so they wouldn’t cut their fingers.
Each guard they took down, Santa moved closer to the elevator by sticking close to the wall and keeping his eyes focused on the main guard guarding the elevator. But since he was right up against the wall, he accidentally bumped into a cabinet and made a bowl on it fall over. “Crap! Crap!” Santa whispered loudly. The bowl-falling alerted the guard and he saw Santa. “Hey, guys! We got an escaped prisoner!” He shouted, but when he looked to his fellow co-workers, they were all knocked out. “Ahem.” Ned cleared his throat behind the guard. The guard spun around and Ned knocked him out instantly.
“Good work, boys! Now let’s go stop Zechinberg!”
Meanwhile, Doctor Zechinberg was sitting down in his lab upstairs. A guard then entered the room. “Sir, your helicopter has arrived. I suggest you leave now because the weather is acting up outside and may affect the flight.” Zechinberg turned around on his swivel chair and faced him. Before he could speak, a man ran into the room. “King Zechinberg, my son just told me he saw someone go into our tunnel that leads to your prison. I thought I should alarm you.” The man said, out of breath. “Yes, you did good, Jackson. You did good by coming to me.” Zechinberg stood up and walked towards him with his cane. “Did your son say what this person looked like?” Jackson thought a moment. “He just said that he had a big nose and glasses. Do you know anybody by that description?” The man called Jackson asked him. “Hmm…” Zechinberg stroked his white beard and adjusted his old glasses. “Ah! Yes! The Big M told me to look out for someone like that.” Zechinberg walked back over to the desk he previously sat at. “’The Big M’?” Jackson repeated. “Big M is a co-worker. He says that person your son saw is one of the few people who can stop me.” Zechinberg then activated the intercom. “Attention all guards, lock the island down and search the base. The boy is in the building.” Zechinberg announced.
Meanwhile, Ned and his friends heard this on the intercom on the way up in the elevator. “Aw crap! He’s onto us!” Den shouted, putting his head into his hands. “Do not worry, my friend. We already took out six guards, how many more could ther-“ The elevator’s doors opened and around 20 guards had their guns locked and loaded at them. Ned, at the speed of light, pressed a button to close the doors and so they did. Gunfire commenced once this happened and put many dents into the door. “We need a way out!” Ned retreated to the sides of the elevator in case if a bullet shot through the doors. “Wait! This is a glass elevator. If I can break through it, we could use a hook and some rope to rappel up the building and get to the top floor!” Santa shared his idea. “But where would we find a hook and some rope?” Den asked, full of no hope. “My pockets! I store everything in here! They’re bigger on the inside.” Santa took out some hook and rope and tied it together. Santa then broke the elevator’s glass and tied the rope to each person on the elevator. “After you, Ned!” Santa said, suggesting he go first. “There’s no way I’m going out there!” Ned said, afraid. “For God sake, just go!” Santa said, pushing Ned out. “WOAAAAAAAH!!!!” Ned screamed as he fell. Ned didn’t fall to the ground because the rope prevented him from doing so. The rope around Santa connected them all. Santa began climbing the side of the building. Since the weather was rainy, the side of the building was wet with rain. “Oh!” Santa yelled as he slipped, making Ned, Den and the Christmas Pig fall a few feet. “Be more careful, idiot!” Den shouted, mad. The gunfire ruined and burst through the door. The guards were now able to get into the elevator. “Hurry up, man!” Ned shouted. Santa saw that the guards were getting closer, and a sudden boost of adrenaline kicked in. He began speed walking up the side of the building and reached the top in less than 10 seconds.
When they reached the top, Ned noticed a giant circular desk that contained a giant computer in the center of it. Zechinberg was sitting down at the desk. “Hey!” Ned shouted. Zechinberg turned around and they became face to face. “Doctor Zechinberg? I’ve been looking for you.” Ned said, standing up and untying the rope from his waist. “Yes, indeed. And I have been expecting you.” Zechinberg said, taking out a gun and pointing it at them. Ned and the others put their arms in the air. “I know why you’re here. It’s because of the tech I have, isn’t it?” Zechinberg asked. Ned nodded. “Well you’re not getting any of it!” Zechinberg shouted. “Once I step foot in that helicopter over there, it’ll take me to someone very special in Russia where I’ll share all of the United States’ secrets with. It’ll cause World War 3!!!” He shouted even louder. “You don’t sound American. What are you?” Den asked. “I’m German, you estupide fool!” Zechinberg then noticed Santa. “Ah! Santa and the annoying little pig. How wonderful.” The Christmas Pig muttered something in Pig Language. “Silence! I have everything I need in this little USB. I’m going to blow up this station and this island and none of you will make it out alive except me!” Zechinberg backed up to the helicopter. “You’re insane!” Ned shouted at him. “Self-destruction: 3 minutes” Zechinberg programmed the computer by voice-only. A giant countdown appeared on the computer in the center of the room. “That should give me enough time to escape the blast.” Zechinberg hopped into the helicopter. He waved them goodbye as the helicopter rose quickly into the sky. Ned quickly came up with an idea. He grabbed the rope and hook and flung it onto the helicopter and it attached to an extension of the helicopter used as a mini-staircase.
“WOAAAAAH!!!!!” Santa shouted as he and the others were flung into the air, now being attached to the helicopter. “ARE YOU CRAZY, NED?!!!” Den screamed. “It’s our only way of stopping him!” Ned shouted back at him. Ned was the only one who wasn’t attached to the rope, so he climbed up to the helicopter itself. Ned looked down and saw they were at least 600 feet into the air. “Oh Lord!” Ned felt uneasy. Ned quickly looked away and focused on climbing. With the fear of falling, his legs were shaky and he felt like he was going to fall any moment. Before he knew it, he was to the top. “HYAH!” Zechinberg shouted as he kicked Ned in the face before the latter could climb into the helicopter. Ned held the rope tightly so he didn’t fall off. Zechinberg proceeded to kick Ned in the face several times. “STOP IT!!!” Ned shouted, grabbing Zechinberg’s foot and accidentally making the latter fall overboard. “AHHH!!” Zechinberg shouted, holding on to Ned’s leg. “Don’t let me fall! Don’t let me fall!” The old man shouted. While looking down at Zechinberg, hovering over the ocean in the process, Ned saw something strange in the water. “What the…HECK IS THAT?!” He shouted, making everyone look down at the water. A giant whale then sprung up out of the water and revealed its awesome nature. “My God, that’s Pumpkin!” Zechinberg said. “Who’s Pumpkin?!” Ned asked him, having to shout because the helicopter was so loud. “She was a test subject of mine from a few years ago. She escaped captivity and yet – there she is!” Zechinberg laughed. “She’s come home!” He said cheerfully – in a maniac like way. “Come home? She doesn’t look too happy to me.” Ned added. Seconds later, the island blew up due to the self-destruct. The helicopter then hit some major turbulence and made everyone lose balance. Ned quickly got his grip back on the rope, although Zechinberg wasn’t so lucky. Instead of hanging on to Ned’s leg, he was down to his shoe. “Ahhh! Look at all the elves dying! Hah! Like I ever cared about them.” He smirked. “You’re an evil man, Doctor Zechinberg.” Ned told him. Zechinberg looked up at Ned. He then gave Ned a look that was indescribable. It was a face that was full of regret, and almost fear. He’s been doing something horrible for a long time, yet he just realized it. “If there are any survivors…tell them…I’m sorr-“ But Zechinberg was so caught up in the moment, he momentarily lost his grip and fell to the ocean. “NOOOO!!!” Ned shouted, failing to catch him. Pumpkin the whale popped out of the ocean again and caught his falling body – eating it in the process. Ned’s eyes widened. “My God!” He shouted. “He just got eaten by a whale!” But there was little time. “Ned, behind you!” Santa shouted. Ned looked back up to the helicopter and saw Zechinberg’s final guard, pointing a gun at him. “Come on! Up!” The guard said, making Ned get into the helicopter. He then helped Den, Santa and the Christmas Pig in as well. They all sat in a small cabin inside the helicopter and awaited death. “Wait here.” The guard said. He locked them in the back of the helicopter and went back to the cockpit. “Big M? Zechinberg has just died. I am going to kill his murders any minute. I thought I should let you know.” Meanwhile, in the cabin, Santa realized something. “Why, I say! We’re not on the island anymore. I can use my magic!” Santa stood up and used his magic to unlock the door. He then snuck up behind the pilot and knocked him out. “All done! Oh, and since I doubt you guys know how to fly a helicopter, I’ll just use my magic to fly it.” Santa said, feeling like a boss. “But who was he on a call with?” Ned said, running to the in-built communicator in the cockpit. “Hello? Who’s there?” Ned said, speaking into it. “Ned…is that you?” A distorted voice came through. “Yes, this is Ned. Who are you?” Ned asked. All Ned got in return was a loud maniacal laugh and then the communication went dead. “That was creepy.” Ned had a creepy chill go down his back. “Come on, let’s go home. And by home I mean let’s go to Washington D.C.” Santa said, turning the helicopter around.
The four arrived later that evening to the White House in Washington D.C. and they landed the helicopter softly on the front lawn. “But we can’t go out there! What if someone from the street sees you?” Ned said, stopping Santa. “You’re right. I’ll disguise myself as a CIA agent.” Santa then sprinkled magical dust over his head and he changed his outfit and shape. “Let’s go.” He told them.
They walked up and were greeted by two agents at the front door who recognized Ned and Den.
Just as they were walking through the door, they were greeted by the president.
“Ned! Did you do it? Is Zechinberg stopped?!” The President was eager to hear his response.
“Well I stopped him. But…he died. He got eaten by a whale.”
The President then gave them food and water in the Oval Office.
As time passed, Ned and Den played Tic-Tac-Toe near the fireplace and the Christmas Pig watched them. Santa was reading a book and drinking hot chocolate. Seconds later, an agent ran into the room. “Mr. President, we went back to the base and we found his reindeer. Somehow, the blast didn’t affect them. Anyway, they’re being transported here now.” He announced. “I knew they were still alive!” Santa said, proud of them. “There’s just…one more thing. On the island, there was an entire community of…elves. Like the ones that work with Santa, but they looked different. They were more human in a sense. The bomb or whatever happened sunk half of the island and destroyed everyone’s homes. We had a troubling time trying to get to Santa’s reindeer because there was this short kid who was claiming death to Ned.” This sparked Ned’s attention. “What? Why me?” Ned asked, looking away from the game he was playing. “He said you were responsible for destroying the island and killing their ‘king’ Zechinberg.” The agent informed him. “Zechinberg activated the self-destruction thing himself. And he’s the one that lost grip on me. I tried to help him.” Ned told him. “I know. I believe you. He was in the middle of the market preaching in a way to all the people around him. Some even stopped what they were doing and believed him. It was like this kid wanted revenge on you. We asked him who he was and all he said was ‘Waterbagel’.” Ned squinted and thought hard. “I don’t know, he was probably drunk or something.” Ned dismissed any further thoughts and resumed his game.
The President gladly gave them dinner an hour later and sent them home afterwards. Den went home by helicopter, Santa stayed at the White House and waited for his reindeer and Ned was going to go home with a prototype hovering car.
“Ned! I want you try out something. You’re old enough to drive, right?” The President asked him.
“Well, there’s this prototype car I want you to test out. If you can master it, I’ll let you have it. You’ll be driving on a road without cars and you’ll get home really quickly.”
“Sure!” Ned accepted.
The President took Ned in an underground part of the White House that was a tunnel and introduced him to the car. “Ned, this is the BO-2011.” The President rubbed his hand over it and showed Ned its smooth design. “What’s the ‘BO’ stand for?” Ned was curious. “Barack Obama.” He replied. “Oh cool.”
Ned got in the car and it had tons of technology in it. “Cool!” Ned was impressed. “Now the controls are really easy. Just hit that round button and it’ll start to hover. Step down on that gas pedal and use the wheel like any other car.” He showed him. “Nice!” Ned felt the wheel and it was leathery and felt brand new. “With Santa and his reindeer saved, and a big threat gone, it’s safe to say you saved Christmas. So, this is my Christmas gift to you.” Ned smiled. “Thank you, President of America!” The President smiled back. “Go on, now! You don’t want to keep your father waiting.”
Ned started driving the car and drove super-fast down the tunnel and it lead him into a forest. The President was right, there were no cars down here. About an hour later, it was pitch black outside and Ned could barely see. The headlights of the car were bright, but not bright enough to see 10 feet in front of him. Ned then had to turn left on the road, but didn’t the road curve left and drove straight into a tree. “Ah!” Ned shouted as the car got wrecked and he went through the windshield. He landed in the fluffy floor of the forest and he looked up and wondered where he was. The forest was huge and he didn’t even know where his surroundings were because it was so dark. Ned took out his flashlight and walked through the forest quietly. He heard owls and crickets in the distance and his heartbeat was loud. He then heard this electronic sound like a zap and he turned around. “Hello? Who’s there?!” Ned was afraid. Ned decided to keep walking the way he was walking and approached a tree. “Is this a tree? Yeah…” Ned then walked around it, but came across something. A face. In the dark. “Ah!” Ned, backed up and fell into the leaves on the ground. “Ahh! Ahh! Ahh!” Ned shouted as the face covered him. The fall knocked the wind out of him. The face was then on the ground like it was a mask or something. Ned looked at the mask and uttered his final words. “Who….are you?” He gasped out, and then fainting. “Your worst nightmare.” The mask replied.
Ned then awoke two months later in a park, minutes from his house, and ran back home to his father.
- Throughout the story, there are different hints to who Claudia Waterbagel could be. The biggest hint is that he's a "kid" and "short".
- Ned Saves Christmas: The Book shows that Ned Thunderzap and Den are officially cousins.
- The mysterious, abrupt ending ties in with the Ghost of Ned's House era. For more, read here: The Ghost of Ned's House.
- This book reveals that the "President of America" Ned always refers to is in fact Barack Obama and not a fictional president.
- The name "Zechinberg" is similar to that of Mark Zuckerberg, the creator of Facebook.
- Jackson the Elf, who makes a brief appearance in this book is going to be the secondary antagonist of A Very Ned Movie.